Nobody Told Me!

Nobody told me that school supplies for two children were going to cost what I've been spending on the textbooks for an entire grade, or apparently, the cost of being a new client at a chiropractor's office.
I feel deeply betrayed by life--everything one could imagine within nearby driving distance with no ability to drive myself, and no way I'm getting into one of those offices anytime soon.

And that my dear friends, concludes the first official whine session of 2015 in lil's crazy corner. There will be coffee and real wine for those who wish to hang around for the next one. Shouldn't be too much of a delay lol.

Last Keywords of 2014

Here's my roundup of somewhat entertaining searches that got people here last year. With, of course, the necessary commentary. It's not quite as entertaining as some have been in the past, but maybe that's just because I've been rather boring...

"BDSM turns me on but I don't want..." Omg, I hate blogger stats--don't want what?? To be bossed around, to be hurt, pigtails (I mean, I certainly don't want pigtails), to submit, what??

"How to make my wife submit to my power." Really dude? Good luck with that one...Let us know how you feel about living in your car!

"Anal dominate with my wife - porn". This one is really only funny because I feel that I owe the poor man an apology, given the the vast discrepancy between what he was looking for, and what he actually got.

"Pee in a cup every morning thing." Whatever, I don't want to talk about it!

"local submissive slave needing a master" Looking for him here, is she...Oh no she didn't! 

"slap face fuck cry" I am absolutely blown away by the eloquence...

"How to be a good submissive" Oh honey...You won't find that here I mean, I wish you could, but...Yea...I'm too much a of a work in progress.

"I am a needy submissive." I would say welcome to the club, but that's not really what I want to be known for....

"Master withdrawals submissive." See? It's a real condition thingy!!

"How is it okay for my husband to rub on a stripper?" Ooh...Well...?

"We think things" Of course we do.  Love it!

"mama always said calm" Well, my mama didn't, but I'm sure somebody out there has a nice calm mother...

"go bad moment" C'mon, it's cute!

"submissive to my husband's gf" I think I'd rather die. And I say that with complete sincerity.

A New Year

Has it really been 7 days since my last post? Dunno how that happened...Actually, I lie--I know exactly how it happened. Kids, people, investors, more people, business stuff, broken car, dog drama, and did I mention all the fucking people?

I fell off the wagon. I know that's not news, I fell off a long time ago. Just how far I fell is only sinking in now though. You know, that point when the change becomes almost normal, then one day you wake up and realize that it's not actually your normal?

Yea...It's really difficult for me here--this whole power exchange thing. I was already drifting when we left, and now...If I want work, people need to see me as independent, and take away the fact that my car hates me and I can't drive myself anywhere, I am...It's hard to leave it at the door when most of the work is starting at home.

And I get attached to Little Miss Independent. She's competent and confident, shit gets done like it should, when it should. I have little interest in ever letting her turn off, tone down, or let go enough to be anything else.

The thing is...It's showing on us. We're good. Hell, even at our worst, we're still pretty damn good. But we're not us good. There's more snark, less harmony, less intimacy...

We will get it all figured out, all ironed out, all...But this whole entirely new life thing? It's complicated.

I want to be here more, and I will. I just gotta wrap my head around life as I know it now.

Did you notice? It's a whole new year.

Still Alive

Okay, so maybe it wasn't so terribly soon...But ya know...

The move was a bitch. How could driving 22 straight hours with two dogs, two cats, and two kids be anything else?
My car didn't like it. As in desperate need of repair didn't like it. But that's okay...Nice thing about a regular paycheck is being able to afford to fix your transportation to work. Lol.

Just thought I'd drop by and say that I'm still alive, and thank you all for the comments on my last post. It's nice to know that this little corner with all of its awesome people is still here. No matter where I am.

Now I'm off on the desperate search for somebody to fix my neck so that I can ditch this constant headache. The whole eeny meeny miny moe the yellow pages thing sounds so dangerous when looking for people to crack your neck...

Be Back Soon. I Hope...

We Could Be Nothing Else...

There hasn't really been any kink around here for some time. There also hasn't been a whole lot of submission, if I'm gonna be honest...Because life, not taking my medicine, grandma, life, kids, and more friggin ridiculously stressful beautiful life.

Having spent the day on the couch attempting, somewhat unsuccessfully, to recuperate from being assaulted by books and bed frames yesterday, I had some time to think (mind you, it's a terrible time to "Take a day to think". There simply isn't time for it. I wanted to. That's my story and I'm sticking to it).
But I have once again tripped my way into the pitfalls of digression...

The way we are is not something that I have ever seen reflected in the vanilla couples we have known. Not just the way we have been since consciously shifting our dynamic to one of dominance and submission, but the way that we have always been.

He takes those big steps out, he makes things happen and forges the trail for me to follow.

I have never rented a post office box, opened a bank account, lived alone, registered a car, set up voice mail, or done a myriad of things that most humans consider part of experiencing daily life.

While I am very much a "Do whatever needs to be done" kind of person, the ultimate responsibility for the movement of our lives falls to him (mind you, there are many thing such as scheduling and anything whatsoever to do with doctor which do not fall under this heading).
He has always been the final line of responsibility for our family.

Anyways...

Sometimes I resent the things he expects of me, especially when he's not showing what I think of as "active" dominance (gods know, I do need that). But I think there are many things he does, the way we have always been and lived, and for him those are very much what being a dominant is about.

Looking beyond the kink, beyond  the things we often think of as being D/s, beyond the conscious choices of power exchange, it is still clear that we could be nothing else. Because it is there in the very fabric of how and who we are.

The Great Online Cookie Exchange Extravaganza

It's that time of year again! Time for the annual online cookie exchange extravaganza, hosted by the lovely Jz.

The cookie exchange extravaganza will be on December 10th this year!

How it works:

Before Tuesday, December 9th, (this is important, she compiles a list of all the participants so that we can all post the links on our blogs, late submissions create more work for her, and may result in your blog not being on the list. We don't want to miss any goodies!) send Jz your name, and the link to your blog.
Jz will use that information to compile a list of blog links that we can put in our recipe posts (you will receive the list via email). That way, everyone will be able to hop around and find all of the awesome recipes.
On December 10th, you post your goody recipe, (anything sweet, not just cookies) with the list of links from Jz, and we all get to spend the day increasing our stash of treat recipes!

If you have any questions, feel free to leave me a comment, and I'll do my best to answer!

Edited to add: Good recipes of all kinds are welcomed, not just sweets! Thank the gods, because after this one I'll have used up my best desserts...