Last night was painfully intense. Not so much physically, as mentally. M told me to get Him hard with words alone...When I couldn't seem to "connect that dirty mind with [your] mouth," M demanded I tell Him about the first time I had cyber sex. I couldn't remember.
M has decided that it's time for me to find another woman for Him to play with. He asked if I understood that He could only know that I really meant it when I said I would do whatever He told me to, if He actually called the bluff and I proved it. M can be a very serious human being. He is rarely as serious as He was last night. He told me that it was important I understand that everything He does is done with my best interests in mind. With His wants and desires forefront of course. By the end of the night I knew without a doubt that the day is coming where I'm tied at the foot of the bed watching Him fuck another woman. A woman I have to find. Ironically, I don't much like women. I don't mean sexually (though members of my sex don't exactly light my fire), I just find most women to be catty and intollerable. Yea I know, viciously betraying my own sex. Sadly, most of the ones worth talking to, would probably agree with me. I went to sleep and woke up feeling like my mind had been turned inside out and upside down.