Friday, January 23, 2015

Stupid System

I get it now. Why so many kids give up, flail off, and do poorly in school.

It's because the system sucks.

Everybody's always going on about "These kids today" and how
'They're not motivated to make anything of themselves, blah blah blah."

I'm inclined to think that, quite often, it's not their fault. Depending on your geographical location, I suppose, not only is excelling not encouraged, it's damn near impossible.

Two weeks in, and I've already had it with the public school system.

To skip a grade, I'd have to homeschool the little guy for two years because of "age restrictions", then take in the piles of every piece of work he did over those two years to prove that he did it.

If he tests into the 99th percentile, he can go to the gifted program next semester. So basically, he's screwed this semester, and any kid who places into the 90th percentile, but not the 99th, is stuck being taught the lower concepts with the rest of the crowd. It's asking a lot of the little guy, especially given that he is completely unfamiliar with the testing format. That's also a whole lot of pressure for a six year old when he knows it's the difference between being bored to tears and happily challenged!

If you're behind, there's programs galore, and everybody has ideas about how to help you. If you're average your golden--you can roll with the crowd, slide along under the radar with minimum effort, and be considered just peachy. If you're ahead of the curve, but not "Profoundly gifted", you're just screwed. Nobody knows what to do with you, or has time to deal with you.

They're testing him for various things this week and next. Next Friday I meet with his teachers, the principal, and the school counselor to see if they can work with him. You know, to try and do something about my problem child. Since, apparently, it's a problem to be smart. Unless you're a genius, which he is not.

Stupid ass jacked up system.


  1. I've been following these last few posts as I am fairly new to reading your blog but it's great!

    I have been dealing with something very similar with my now almost 13 year old son. Starting advocating ( or fighting) for him since he was 2. I know all districts are different and I'm sure states are quite different as well. But if you ever need ideas on how to get around things or get certain things done, feel free to ask! I'm sure you have a ton of people reaching out to you also. I just felt I should too ;) I have 11 years of experience at this point! Lol

    1. Cherished by Him,
      I am surprised and touched to hear that you think the blog is great--been stuck in a pretty whiny rut unrelated to D/s lately lol.
      Thank you.

      I have almost 2 weeks experience lol. And it's been a pretty steep learning curve. Really, I guess my focus for the week will be trying to convince the school that he's worth spending extra time on within his class (there are two teachers, so this is feasible) though they are wanting to make that decision based on how well he does with testing this week. That's hard for me, because the testing is sooo unfamiliar to him, that while I know he Knows the work, I'm honestly not sure that knowledge will come through in testing.

      Then I have another kiddo who's doing great this semester--totally awesome teacher who's really inspiring him, has taken note of him, etc. So I haven't been worried about him. But it occurs to me since everything takes so much fucking time, next semester at a different school might be different. So I don't want to let him fall into the same boat the little guy is in now...

      So yes, any advice, solicited or otherwise, is always welcomed!

  2. I have been fighting this fight since my son started Kindergarten. We had the option of skipping a grade and going straight into 1st grade but he was not mature enough in my opinion. He stayed put and I have fought with the school every year. He is extremely smart and gets bored easily which means he can get into trouble. We have had to talk to teachers and principles and anyone else we could get to listen.

    He is now in the 5th grade and he has had a really good year. He is able to do more difficult work and stay ahead of his class. At home he is teaching himself about electronics and is planning a robot. I am very thankful for his drive and ability to overcome a broken school system.

    We are getting ready to move to a large city and hope the school will offer more options for him. If not, I may home school him. I seem to have rambled but I just wanted you to know you are not alone. I have gone through so many years of fights and stress without any support system. Most people just tell me to be happy because he "gets good grades". I want more for him than just a good report card.

    Keep fighting for your guy and I am sure you will figure out what is best for him and your family. And I am here if you need to vent or ask questions.

    1. Master's Pet,
      Oh, the boredom issue! That's such a rough one. With mine, I have noticed a tendency for boredom to make them look stupid on paper--they quit paying attention and actually come off as behind, not ahead. It's hard.

      Hearing that your guy is doing well in 5th grade is encouraging to me. It's awesome that he's planning a robot, and motivated enough to push himself along! It's sad that how well they do is defined more by their own ability to push themselves than it is by the school systems doing the job it was created for.

      Don't apologize for rambling! I am trying to suck up as many experiences and points of view as I can!
      I hope that moving to a bigger city gives you the options he needs. I thought we had done that when we came here, but so far...Every place is different though, and I hope he gets into an awesome school that encourages him to finish that robot!

  3. I've been dealing with this with my kids. Our principal wouldn't let them start K early because he thinks all kids need to get older to be mature. They were both reading chapter books before K. Our district won't acknowledge gifted kids until midway through 3rd, though they only need 95th. Problem is my kids are lazy about school and haven't learned to put in any effort since it's so easy. There's gonna be a rude awakening someday...

    1. Chickadee,
      Oh the reading thing...My little guy has a B in reading, which boggles my mind because he's reading at a 3rd grade level and they started them on kindergarten books in the middle of 1st grade! If he's bored though, he kind of lets it go in one ear and out the other...Told him that's not okay.

      It's hard when they have all this potential but want to be lazy and skate with the crowd--that's how my eldest is.

  4. Hang in there Lil and keep up the fight. It's maddening that there is help galore for kids at the other end of the spectrum while the gifted ones fall through the cracks. I hope there is some positive outcome when you meet with the school next.


    1. ROz,
      it truly is maddening!
      The best I think I can hope for with the school is to get them to work with him extra and put more one on one time into him. But they're going to base that decision on tests he takes this week, and he hasn't been testing well, so we'll see. I'd rather not have to pull him out and homeschool him for the next 2 1/2 years!


Play nice.