So it really is true, we get what we ask for. Most of the time we just didn't put enough thought into that asking, key little things you know, like "I want a day without the kids," but naturally, we never think to add "without being sick, without drama, etc." So, inevitably, we get that day without the kids, or whatever it was we asked for, yet naturally we forgot to put out all the specifics so we are either sick, or the day just otherwise does not turn out how we imagined. I am beginning to be used to getting what I ask for with a nice dose of Murphy's Law on top. This thread of thought was inspired last night when M, with a sexy sadistic little twinkle, told me I had best be careful what I ask for because I will get it. So here's to hoping Murphy's Law takes it easy on me this time around. I just see no real reason for M to keep suppressing his desires purely to avoid damaging me. I think we have reached the point where it does more harm than good to us both for Him to do so. I can say this because I have faith in M and I know that, even if I find some of our experiences unpleasant (yea yea, the masochist squirming in the sadists playground, I am aware of the irony), he will always keep my well-being in mind.
I came to the conclusion that the meaning of life is to live the most vast range of experiences and emotions possible. Life is love, pain, laughter, joy, sadness, sex, magic, blood, pleasure... All to often we spend our days categorizing people and experiences into good or bad, doing anything we can to avoid submitting to the grey areas of experience that life throws our way. Pretending that life can be painted in a pretty picture of perfection. Doing whatever it takes to keep people from noticing that we are all whores, sadists, masochists, submissives, Dominants, and primal beings at heart. And so the human race continues to lie to itself every day. Thinking that we can wrap life up in a pretty little bow and pretend there's no blood, no pain, no passion in the dark reaches of our hearts.
I am a
slave to another's desires
tears in the dark
that passionate spark
human being being human
I have been washed clean,
seen to the very roots of my being,
swam on the waves of Master's breath
I am a child of the Earth
until she calls me home to the dirt, I will continue to be nothing more and nothing less than simply