So, like I said in my last post, I read "The Story of M" a few days ago and was rather disappointed. The back of the book promises a story of growth and a woman claiming her sexuality by becoming a slave (alright, so the irony wasn't lost on me, but hey, the last time a BDSM related book fell in my lap was never, so I was ready to read it).
And yes, a couple hundred pages of smut was quite entertaining for someone who has been book deprived lately and desperately wanted to escape the reality of her living room, but where was that whole bit about personal growth and evolution as a being? She got over her jealousy issues and hey, as my own personal green-eyed little monster, I can't fault anyone for that or say it isn't an accomplishment. But if you want to write smut, nothing wrong with calling it what it is lol.
Anyways...It did get me to thinking about ttwd--is it really just a way to get your rocks off, or does it offer a twisted path to personal growth if you chooses to walk it? Hey, I'm all about getting off, but it isn't the most important thing.
Looking back over the last few years, we have both grown a lot. We have evolved as human beings and our relationship has solidified in amazing ways. Is our relationship based solely on ttwd? Certainly not. But it is deeply entwined in who we are and the way I see Alpha and myself, and the world as a whole has changed. I used to see strength and independence as exerting my will, usually in an attempt to get my way.
Now I see them in a completely different light--independence is the ability to think for yourself and make the best decisions possible when they are yours to make. And strength? Well, sometimes it takes a hell of a lot more to acquiesce than it does to get your way.
Ttwd isn't about whips and chains (thought I am not knocking the whips and chains. May I please have a pillow too?), it's about what goes on in our minds and how we can connect on a deeper level. Perhaps even grow as human beings.