Monday, June 20, 2011

He rattled my comfort zone

 Alpha and I had a talk on the way home last night. A bit of a novelty these days because we had no one else in the car except for a sleeping baby so it offered up some new and uncomfortable avenues of communication lol. He asked what had been up with me lately.
Well geez, there's just so many options, where to begin? The laundry is out of control, the living room has turned into someone else's bedroom, my job is very close to being a stepping stone to the looney bin....Oh, You were talking about a different arena completely? My bad. So under the glaring ceiling light of the car (what is up with the light shit? I swear, there's no friggin hiding in the dark around here), I admitted my contrary conundrum--I didn't feel submissive and didn't really want to submit anymore but I wanted to explore more, go further into ttwd. No need to tell me it doesn't make sense, I am well aware of that fact, thus it's title as an "admission" lol.
The eyebrow went up of course and my backasswards statement even got a reply that made sense--that's because you know there's not much left besides things that are completely unwanted in our relationship, or totally outside of your comfort zone. Insert thwarted attempt at turning off ceiling light.
And He's right, I get pretty used to my cozy little comfort zone, and ttwd is part of our reality and therefor must fit into the parameters and restrictions of the life we live.

So He proceeded to shove me right out of my happy little zone and into the dark unknown. Well, in all fairness, this post is written kind of backwards event-wise. He had already kicked my comfort zone about twenty minutes earlier...

I suppose a little bit of background information would probably be helpful (for my readers that is, there's no hope for me lol). Years ago, Alpha and I were at a concert. Now, if you go to a concert around here it's going to be small, and chances are you will see the same people at the supermarket the following day. If you don't see them there, you can be guaranteed to see them at some point.
Anyways, at this particular event there was a very drunk woman. I remembered her clearly because I have never had someone all over me like she was lol. Now keeping in mind that it's a small town, she happens to be friends with a couple we have known for a very long time and we usually see her when we go to events at their house.

And apparently, years later and not drunk, she still wants me. And it makes me squirm. And Alpha's an ass a sweet Dominant, so He loves it.

Now I have to ask her if she wants to go out for coffee with me. There is a silver lining--she works at a clothing store so I get to go buy a new outfit and ask while I'm there. I did try to weasel my way into the possibility of multiple purchases in case I had to go back because she wasn't working when I went...there is hope.

He see's it as a win win situation, I mean, after all, isn't He justified in pointing out that my friendship base is severely depleted. Pfbt.
Of course, there's still that little issue about the majority of women and I not getting along at all...

Omg. I finally got to do a post that wasn't typed out during sil's shower time. I even got to go blog browsing this morning...It's those little things I take for granted that are what I really miss lol.

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