I'll try to only go in one direction at once with my
Since we had the house to ourselves for a little while, we took full advantage. For Alpha "Taking full advantage" often means doing things that elicit sounds of pain from me.
I informed him that I am not a masochist after all, and that "The fantasy of belonging to a sadist was so much more fun than the reality."
Much to my surprise, he looked at me thoughtfully and said, "You should do a post about it. I think that many people have the fantasy, but feel differently about the reality."
Alpha indulges his sadistic tendencies in little ways quite often, but what he really loves, what really gets him off, is the sound of my pain.
Given that our kids are with us 24/7, it's not a sound that he gets to hear very often.
According to him, "There's nothing sexier than the sound of a woman in pain."
The sound that comes from the pleasure-pain combination does something for him that just...
The fantasy of a sadist is hot.
It's sexy, and dark, and mysterious, and scary, and exciting, and fulfilling, and dangerous, and well--it's hot right?
The reality of a sadist is, well, it's all of those things. But it is also very different. It can be unpleasant, unwanted, inescapable, and...Just downright painful.
The reality is that he will hurt you until his desire to do so is sated, until his need is fed, until he is done.
Not until you no longer want it, feel that you have no need for it, or until you think that you are done.
In fact, in my experience, Alpha will not quit until long after I am sure that I can take no more.
It seems that before then, his experience remains incomplete. And to get what he needs, he has to take me beyond what I need.
Sometimes it scares the shit out of me. And the fear gets me off. Then getting off feeds the pain. And my pain gets him off.
The fantasy sadist will give you what you want, and just as much as you think you need.
The reality of a sadist is that he will take what he wants until he has gotten what he needs.