Saturday, July 26, 2014

He Makes Me Be Better

I've been thinking again...

He makes me a better person. Not just figuratively, he literally makes me be a better person. Sometimes I resent that fact, but overall, it's good for me. I guess...

I could give anyone anything, let anyone take advantage, go to any lengths, and part the damn seas for them. I could just as easily morally justify taking a baseball bat...
Overall, there's not usually a whole lot of in between in how I feel about people.

Alpha, on the other hand, is a fairly easy-going man. He always tries to see where other people are coming from, and understand the reasoning behind the fucked up things they do.

Me? I can be somewhat unreasonable in that I don't really care why people do the fucked up things they do. As long as I have done nothing to warrant their derision, the motivation matters not one bit to me.

I also have a consistently malfunctioning brain to mouth filter, (just in case no one noticed) and he encourages a certain amount of polite self censorship.

I had an interesting conversation the other day...My mother and I had initiated an intervention because it's totally not okay for a full grown man to be beating on his mom.
Let's just say that this particular conversation was a bit of backlash from that situation. Eventually, the words "Should I just off myself?" were uttered in an appropriately dramatic fashion. I was a good girl. Every part of my brain was screaming, "Just remember dude, up the river, not across! Instead, I diplomatically settled for, "Suicide is a bitch way out. Don't be stupid".

Maybe that brain to mouth filter still needs a tiny bit of polishing...


  1. I think i may put that graphic up on the fridge, F word and all. I couldn't follow the who's and what's of this, - but that's obviously not at all important. What you said is true - and i hope the effort was successful - cuz yea, beating on one's mom is never okay.

    1. gg,
      I was considering gluing it to the ceiling above my boy's bed...Seems reasonable!

      I think that the efforts were successful...He's not going to turn into a completely different human being, but he should be keeping his hands off his mom...

  2. I don't think I was supposed to laugh at your diplomatic response...but I did. It's just so true! :)

    If he is stupid enough to kill himself...well, let's just say I don't see a reason for a filter in this situation.

    1. Misty,
      as inappropriate as this may be, I might have laughed when I said it...I'll not admit for sure either way!

      In all fairness, I did do a fair amount of advocating for counseling. That counts for something, right?


Play nice.