i have no title...

He makes me do it, then gives me a B+ and says i came on to strong. The sad thing is, He's right.
Lol. It was a disaster. i am a walking disaster in this endeavor. In my defense, i told her i was a falling all over the place right off the bat!
i think that for M, the whole thing was about making me do something i find extremely uncomfortable and watching me squirm more than anything else. Well, the thought of possibly making another woman squirm at the same time didn't hurt either. i have a hard time expressing fantasies to M (myself too lol). To tell one he told me and that W/we got off on to a person it was about, who i genuinly like, really fried my circuits.
After i reach a certain point of discomfort with something, i fuck it up. i'm not good at expressing to others the things that i have difficulty admitting to myself or M.
i think i completely lack the ability to pull this off...i feel squirmish because i said what i said to her, and i feel like a disappointment because M's reaction to my approach was slightly less than satisfied (which is understandable). Sigh. i feel funky.