Thursday, December 2, 2010


Okay, this is my pre-work rambling so if it's incoherent, such is life lol. i just want to get my thoughts down before they disappear.
i was thinking about pride last night on the way home. Pride can be good. It prompts us to appreciate a job well done, it encourages us to do things right and stand behind our decisions. Pride can also be a disastrous pitfall. It prevents us from accepting help when we really need it, clouds our vision when we are questioning a judgment call, and it's the little voice in the back of the mind that says "i will not beg." i realized that i am a proud person. Then i began to wonder...why do things that strip away all sense of pride turn me on so much? Humiliation takes pride and washes it away (sometimes quite literally lol). i came to the conclusion that pride is a construct of the mind with social bearing. When i am floating in sub space, all the constructs of who i think i am, and how i believe the world should, be disappear. When i'm on my knees and M is pissing all over me, i have no pride to hide behind. When i accept that my place is at His feet i am serene in the presence of His Dominance and empty concepts of how i think things should be don't matter any more.
i was on a roll and now i have to go to work...

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