Thursday, June 14, 2012

Pure. Uncensored. Rant

I actually think I want to expand on the whole fantasies thing, but I have other thoughts on my mind at the moment.

Would someone kindly tell me why my only true dreams are the bad ones? Well, the ones that are about the living anyways...
I have dreamed that thing1 left rehab, then that she was using again. Then I dreamed of thing2 fighting with her fiance, then I dreamed of her and woke with only a feeling of anger.

So this morning, who calls but thing2's fiance--to say that thing1 left rehab and they moved her in with them. Last week. Because she called up with some line of bullshit about being fed expired food and how terrible the place was.

I picked that rehab for her. And I'm a smart girl. I did massive amounts of research on that place. It was the very best across the board in three states.

I think that love is the most amazing emotion we are capable of. Nothing else can encompass such a wide range of experiences and other emotions.
But love isn't easy is it? Love for lovers, family, friends, life, the family dog...It's not easy.

My head hurts.
Oh yea, and I get to go back to the Doc for a round of tests because apparently, it's not normal to have chronic headaches for this long after an accident.
Who knew? Lol.

I'll respond to the comments on my last post tomorrow. When my mind doesn't feel like it's imploding. One can always at least strive to make sense right?


  1. I dunno.
    Making sense seems highly over-rated sometimes...
    Chin up, sweetie. At some point, it really WILL get better...

    1. Jz,
      Maybe that's my problem--too much effort at making sense! I'll have to reexamine that one lol.

      And really...Thank you.

  2. Hope you feel better soon. Going through test is just the pits.

    I'm sure the rehab was just fine, but unfortunately you just can't make people stay put in them, even to save their own life. No answers for this one.

    1. Serenity,
      on the bright side I'm sure I'll find out exactly how much I'm still in debt to the hospital lol.
      And yes, there was nothing wrong with the rehab and I'm not that surprised she left.
      I am however, painfully surprised that after everything we all went through to get babygirl safely across the country in thing2's care, she fell for a line of crap and brought thing1 up there...

  3. Hope you feel better. You are do for a string of good things soon.

    1. sunnygirl,
      Thank you.
      And I'm ready to grab at that string as soon as it makes an appearance lol.

  4. Hope things improve for you! Love is such a vulnerable thing. We leave ourselves open to be hurt. Sorry you're hurting. Hope you find out what's causing the chronic headaches (tho stress could be a factor).


    1. mouse,
      thank you.
      Love is an incredibly complex emotion isn't it?
      I have found that lots of things, including stress, can set off the headaches. Though I was one of those people who only had 2 or 3 a year before the accident. And that was like a year ago...I'll never take that for granted again lol. Sometimes I think my body just likes to go haywire and watch me squirm.

  5. I hope things get better for you soon, keeo your head up.


Play nice.