Friday, June 8, 2012

O/our Space

Occasionally I find myself in a bit of a quandary (yes, I said occasionally. Go ahead, finish snorting your coffee and have a good laugh. I don't mind. Really).

The thing is, one can't ask for complete honesty from their submissive and expect that they are always going to be happy with what they hear.

Admittedly, communication is not my strong point. And I'm still working on the difficult art of disagreeing respectfully (look, that's not as easy as it sounds ya'know).
Because it's so hard to open my mouth and say something that makes sense and isn't offensive. Yea...Lol.

We have this space though...It's that place with my head on resting on his knee, or laying on his chest, a place where I can say anything, and no matter what I'm saying, it's okay because my words are true.

Perhaps that's one of the things I feel most bereft of (dramatic enough you think?) when we are just floating along vanilla style--I feel like that space kind of disappears. Due in no small part to a lack of those available moments I suppose.
And ironically, my already challenged communication skills manage to deteriorate even further lol.

I could just walk up to him and say, "I need your attention, I need your control, I need that conquered feeling to know I am complete."
And yes, I did say basically that...Followed by "We don't have to be this any more." His response was totally reassuring: "You would have a nervous breakdown."
Umm...Thanks for thinking of me? Lol.

Maybe submission shouldn't be, in such a large part, about a constant need to be conquered. Perhaps one day I'll grow past that.
You know, when I quit breathing at least lol.

I crave the D/s.
It progresses past want to need.
But what I really really need, is O/our space. That place where no matter what is happening, no matter what I tell him, no matter what he decides to do, no matter what is wrong in the world, all is right with us because there is nothing coming between him and I. Not even thought.

And D/s brings us that space. Without effort, without struggle.
It just is.
Us.

14 comments:

  1. "And I'm still working on the difficult art of disagreeing respectfully (look, that's not as easy as it sounds ya'know)."

    Personally one is waiting for someone to write a nice, handy step by step guide to that... preferably one with hand rails and a harness :(

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Master's piece,
      Right?
      With all the damn opinions floating around, it's a crying shame that no one has written an actual manual for this stuff.
      No one will give me a step by step guide...Now where do I file my complaint and get a refund?

      Delete
  2. "We have this space though...It's that place with my head on resting on his knee, or laying on his chest, a place where I can say anything, and no matter what I'm saying, it's okay because my words are true."

    Oh those little quiet spaces are so wonderful and make all the difference in the world. I've never heard it described quite like that, but that is just the perfect word.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Serenity,
      Those moments do make such an amazing difference...

      Delete
  3. Replies
    1. Sir J,
      From lack of experience with it, I'm just not sure what the proper response is to this kind of agreement lol.

      So, I am glad I was able to capture the concept in a way that makes sense (for once).

      Delete
  4. Yes! We are faithful in trying to create the space, but we are not always faithful in getting there. And that is when things get a bit turvy. (As in topsy.)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kitty,
      That's a really great way of putting it.
      And yes they do.

      Delete
  5. It's great that you figured out what you need. Like anything, if you just keep working on it, it will become more of a habit.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. sunnygirl,
      I guess figuring out the need is laying the trenches...The hard part comes in getting it sometimes. It's that run which gets me every time...

      Delete
  6. Replies
    1. mouse,
      Still haven't figured out the proper response to this kind of agreement lol.
      Thank you?
      Hugs back atcha.
      Thanks for stopping by!

      Delete
  7. your post got me to thinking....maybe I'll have to make a post of my own on them thoughts now floating in my head..... Wonderful post though.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. trazuredpet,
      Ooh, thinking...I have been told it's quite a dangerous pastime.
      I would be interested to read your thoughts when you turn them into a post.

      Delete

Play nice.