"At least your fantasies are simple." My eyes wandered off of their own accord..."Well...I keep the complicated ones to myself. There's some things you never tell."
He raised his eyebrows and gave me that look that turns my knees to jelly. "Not for you there isn't."
Twenty minutes later, "Did you take your medicine?" Oh...I was kinda thinking he'd forgotten like I had... "Go take your medicine. Now."
And that's it. That's what feeds me, makes me ache and need, creates weakness in my knees.
I have been going through a bit of physical activity withdrawal (please, tie me, beat me, shove objects where they don't belong, etc). And my body has been an outright traitor (it likes to time it's breakdowns to be as inconvenient as possible).
But overall? It's that control from him that sustains me. I thrive on it like I never thought I could.
They are always looking out for us even when we don't want the scrutiny.
ReplyDeletesunnygirl,
DeleteOh yes. I could say it drives me crazy, because it does...But not in a bad way.
"Now."
ReplyDeleteSuch a powerful word. :)
Mindset,
Deleteyou know, that word is really working it's way up to one of my favorites.
You must love thriving on his control. You are so fortunate he controls you the way you need to be controlled.
ReplyDeleteFD
Ditto!
DeleteFD,
DeleteI am fortunate. Sometimes it is good remind myself just how much so.
It's that weakness that reminds me of how I melt everytime I see the words
ReplyDelete"though I am a slave, I am free for the first time in my life"
Order and discipline is bliss. We soar.
-justine
Justine,
Deleteinteresting how very freeing being owned can be isn't it?
Like I never imagined possible...J.
DeleteOh yes, those little mundane commands do the exact same thing for me. I totally get it.
ReplyDeletedancingbarez,
Deletethey do make such an unbelievable difference!
The same goes for me. If one is not up for the big stuff, either in time or health, there are always the little things.
ReplyDeleteancilla,
DeleteI think that there are times I would go completely batty without the little things!
makes my knees weak.....
ReplyDeleteSaoirse,
Deletemine too. I like to claim that I'm not easy...but I'm not so sure lol.