Sunday, November 3, 2013

Feelings and Other Things

Chess has taken over where soccer left off. Except that it's shaping up to be a family affair, and because I'm crazy, I volunteered to assist at chess club. So I guess I'll have to start playing more, and learn all sorts of basic stuff that I previously had no need of knowing.
The kiddo will be going to the state championships in December.
It's still cold.
I'm behind on the housework.
Still lost: One sex drive. Last seen in the company of an elusive, and rather bitchy, muse.
Alpha and I had a another damn 15 year long fight about checking the mail. Apparently, when you own someone, that someone should do as they're told. Go figure...
He hurt my feelings. Apparently he has feelings of his own. Wtf?

And there's the thing...Feelings.

Sometimes it's easy to forget that he has them too. Hurtable ones anyways. He's like an immutable wall--it doesn't matter what I throw at him, he doesn't budge.
Sometimes I feel like he doesn't listen to me, and "I know" is a common reply, which often leaves me muttering about what he may or may not actually know.

The man infuriates me.
He's pigheaded
loyal to the point of ridiculousness
he's competent and confusing
completely unreasonable
he's infuriatingly logical
he odes things just because he can
and I am convinced that he is fully capable of pissing off a saint.
He an amazing human being and to this day, I still wonder why he chose me.

Then he steps up behind me and grabs my hair, tilting my head back he whispers things in my ear, about how I am his slave always, in all ways. And the world fades away. Because that truth is always there under the surface.
No matter what may or may no be true in life, no matter what else happens, no matter how much he makes me want to kick him, (which incidentally, is completely against the rules because he's a big meanie) I am his.

And now I have to go cook dinner. Wherever did the day go? Damn time change always throws me off...


12 comments:

  1. I keep tripping up on that, "oh, you have feelings, too?" thing, as well.
    But I blame him for this, since he's acts like he doesn't most of the time.

    (my story and I'm sticking with it!)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jz,
      Yes, Yes, Yes!!
      It's a good story, and totally worth sticking to. In fact, I think I'll plagiarize it for future use.

      Delete
  2. Very comforting feeling to be cherished, isn't it?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Ooo I love chess played it since I was 4yrs old....awww behind on house work. not checking the mail I'm right there with ya..however he only gets irritated when I don't check email...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Daisy,
      my dad taught me when I was seven. We taught the kiddo when he was 3, and he's really taken to it.

      Delete
  4. Sounds like my Sir! He rarely shows emotion. Sometimes I wonder if he even cares. When he does it is around friends. Never mind me over here! Lol. -dg

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. dg,
      he shows emotions...Just not the kind that would imply he is capable of feelings that could get hurt lol.

      Delete
  5. I love the last paragraph :)

    Hugs,
    Roz

    ReplyDelete
  6. Men - unreasonable and logical - yep. Whereas I know I'm reasonable and illogical.

    ReplyDelete

Play nice.