Time Flies...

Three years ago today, I asked for permission to start this blog. Not being big on patience, I of course, created it within 24 hours of his granting permission.
Originally, it existed because I have shoddy communication skills. Now? I feel like it is a a great way to interact with others like myself, occasionally communicate things to Alpha that I just can't seem to say, and a method of introspection that often helps me to find clarity, (not to mention that it can be a great place to vent). If it happens to help others along the way, all the better.
I guess I'm also a bit addicted. There are worse vices right?

There are some blogs that have been around for a truly impressive amount of time. In the grand scheme of things, three years isn't that long, but I think that perhaps blog years are kind of like dog years. Only perhaps, one year of life counts as ten blog years?
I have seen many blogs come and go in the short period of time that I have been in Blogland. I think that sometimes we get bored, other times we outgrow it and no longer need or desire what it gives us. For whatever reason, not many blogs seem have a long lasting lifespan.

Perhaps this day deserves a brilliant post...But that's not to be lol.

Blogging...It's an interesting experience.

The title of this blog used to, (quite accurately) be called, "Diaries of a reluctant submissive."
As time went by, I discovered that I wasn't as reluctant as I maybe felt that I should be, so I changed the title and url.

At first, I wrote whatever I wanted because no one read it. Then people started showing up, and I didn't let it change what I had to say. Then one day I thought maybe I shouldn't say whatever popped into my head because well, apparently people were reading.
Then I thought about it...Blogging can be about and for other people, but ultimately it's all about self expression--there's not much point in it for me if I censor myself every step of the way. That would just be lying to myself.
And I got over it.

Depending on the topic, I do occasionally feel a sense of responsibility towards my readers--especially people just starting their journey into D/s. I remember that overwhelming search for information and the desire to read the perspectives of others who had experienced the same things. It really is a lovely feeling when something you say helps the light click on for someone else.
However, I also feel that people need to be responsible for themselves and take what they read, (wherever they may read it) with a grain of salt.
If someone can't interpret my dry and twisted sense of humor, deal with my occasional venting, or tolerate my obvious imperfections, that's okay--they can just move along.

Ultimately, we present whatever face we want--the world sees what they are given, and we offer what we choose to allow people to know.
I occasionally come across blogs that are all sunshine and roses--I move right along. Call me cynical if you want, (Alpha does) but life isn't all rainbows and roses.
It, quite literally, takes plenty of shit to grow flowers.

When I see my blog described elsewhere, it is most often with some variation of "lil's struggles speak to me." Not an award winner for perfection perhaps, but I think we all struggle sometimes, and pretending that we don't doesn't help us grow.

Other people will offer their opinions, because that's what people do. When we broadcast our inner thoughts in a public forum, opinions and criticism are to be expected.
Much like the rest of life, there will be people we like, and who's opinions we respect. And there will be many we don't.

There are some really lovely people out here, and overall, I have been quite blessed by the good character of those who choose to frequent my crazy little corner on a regular basis.