Since I had nothing better to do, I was thinking about a decision which I may or may not have to make, and which may or may not be optional.
Okay, maybe there was something better to do, but since I'm crawling
my way voraciously out of the pit of death (otherwise known as the
common flu, for those of you lacking a proper sense of drama), I get a
little leeway.
Anyways, I'm wandering away from my point--I was thinking about possible consequences of this theoretical event. Not the kind of consequences that reasonable people consider, oh no. Because, as Alpha says, my mind never, "shuts the fuck up".
I was pondering what would happen to my already challenged libido. As in the possibility of it disappearing completely. Forever.
And how he loves me, and I am, to him overall, irreplaceable.
As somebody who gives him the sexual pleasure he needs; however, I am not irreplaceable.
There is only so much in the sexual arena that he is willing to take despite my dislike.
Because he wants me to want it.
But should I be unable to provide for those needs, eventually, he will feed them elsewhere.
When one begins to consider their replace-ability, you realize that there is merit to being owned for a long period of time.
Because isn't that one of the issues that sometimes arises when you have been married for ages, that there is always someone younger and prettier, someone newer, someone different, someone who wants the same things and has the same sexual needs to fill?
Yet
she doesn't know the things I know
she doesn't know exactly how he likes his coffee
or when he takes his showers
she doesn't know what food he detests
or how he likes his back rubbed
she doesn't know what he likes to do
or what he finds attractive
she doesn't know the habits he finds intolerable
or what he finds pleasing.
Those things, and so much more, are learned over time.
They are accumulated in every interaction
every correction
every "Good girl"
every argument, and every agreement.
Knowledge of each other is amassed slowly over time
the slave is made
molded
taught, and observed.
Perhaps the submissive is born, but the slave is created.
As such, she can be remade
as a possession, she can be replaced
but the time that has been spent on her is not comparable to the monetary value an object can assume
and as such
that time cannot be replaced.
The slave may be a possession, but she is not inanimate
she is unique
with desires
wants
and needs.
Time has been spent on her creation
years have been paid for her tuition
the title of slave can name her identity
but it cannot hold the sum of her humanity
and so, as a whole, she may become irreplaceable.
But, if he wants more, there's nothing to say that she will always remain the only one.
Lovely words and thoughts.
ReplyDeleteBut remember, along with your changes come changes for him also.
sunnygirl,
Deletehow do you always manage to say such sweet things And make great points at the same time?!
Thank you.
What a lovely and thoughtful post :)
ReplyDeleteThank you Lola.
DeleteI read a little post .. not too long ago, it brought a tear to my eye. It went something like this ... "TO MY QUEEN ON HER KNEES ... "
ReplyDeleteI have been told that the mind is the biggest sexual organ we have. I believe that .. couple that with the heart(love) and I think THAT makes you irreplaceable.
You should print Alpha's beautiful ode to you & keep it with you thru any & all possible theoretical events.
(((hugs)))
LK
Lost Kittie,
Deleteuh, what post? Not the one I read like ten times written by a lovely man that I stalk on a daily basis...
If only I could get my mind and my body to play nice...
Yeah .. that's the one!! :D And I agree .. I have a body like that as well .. it hates me!
DeleteLil: Feel better soonest.
ReplyDelete(that's all I got...but I am so thrilled to have read a few posts back that you are writing!!!!!! YEA LIL!!! And you discovered ebooks! Yes, lots and lots of free ebooks out there! Do you twitter? If you search by #kindle #free #ebook it often brings up newer books that have been made free via promotions or what have you)
Bleuame,
DeleteI am happy to say that I escaped the flu victorious!
Thank you! And no, I still think twitter might be something to do with birds and electronics...But omgoodies! I must finally admit that ebooks are pretty damn cool.