I have another rant. Though this one is far less interesting. Promise.
My mother has been quite fortunate in her life. Her father set her up very well and made sure that she would never want or need. She has been poor before, but always by choice (if you knew my dad, you would know what could possibly prompt such a choice).
She received a very sizable inheritance when I was 15, and blew it all well before I turned 25. Announcing loudly along the way that such was her intention, and I would never see a penny, but I would eventually inherit the property and the house as long as I didn't push her off a cliff.
I didn't mind, I figured it was her money and she could do whatever the hell she wanted with it. Though it would have been nice if she had thought ahead a bit more for her own future.
My mother is strange about money, and still hasn't realized that I am altogether unimpressed by money or possessions. Seriously, on paper I have nothing except for two children and a stack of medical bills.
I could really care less what someone owns, and how much they do or do not have--I care about how one conducts themselves as a human being.
I don't want to struggle and starve (what lunatic does), but overall, I am really not that attached to money and possessions.
Anyways...
She had a bit of a health scare, and has decided that she wants to sell all kinds of stuff "for [her] benefit". A fact that she informed me of yesterday as I was getting into the car to leave. We aren't talking about crap like grandma's china either--think vehicles, stoves, my dad's pool table (which would seriously mean the world to my eldest. He spent the first years of his life on that table with his grandfather), possibly the house, you get the picture--important shit.
Now, I was a very low maintenance child. I moved out when I was 14, and over the course of my lifetime, I have only asked my mother for one thing--please don't sell everything.
I have never even asked her for the things my father gave away before he died (the truck he left to Alpha, that she has tried to sell numerous times comes to mind).
Every single time I object to her selling everything off, she acts like I don't care about her quality of life, and I just want what she has. It's an attitude I have no idea how to respond to, because in those moments, it seems like she doesn't know me at all. Of all the uncomplimentary things I may consider myself to be on any given day, greedy is one that has never made the list.
I'm so tempted to tell her whatever, sell it all. But when she blows through the money like water and has nothing, who's responsible for taking care of her? Last time I checked, that was the drawback to being an only child.
Don't get me wrong, I do love my mother immensely. Besides Alpha and the boys, she is the only family I have, and most days, we are great friends. But there are days when she makes me wanna trip her at the top of the stairs.
Have you talked to her about the fact that it will be you that will be left to look after her if she doesn't make sensible financial decisions now (having not made them in the past)?
ReplyDeleteAva,
DeleteI prefer to rant before doing lol.
My mom can be a very odd individual.
Ava has some good ideas. If your mom will listen to reason suggest a meeting with a financial consultant so she can put the proceeds somewhere and then dole them out on a monthly basis instead of blowing it all at one time.
ReplyDeleteAs for the pool table, offer to purchase it from her, then you are assured it will be there for your son.
Good luck
sunnygirl,
DeleteAh well, 12 years ago there might have been a point in that. She's not off great or terrible--she's really just not thinking about logistics. She goes through these phases every so often, they just get worse lol.
Not only do I not have money for that pool table, there are many reasons that I absolutely refuse to buy it. Among those is the fact that she doesn't even need to sell it.
P.S After reading my response, I felt like I came off a bit snarky, so I just wanted to apologize and say that I didn't mean to come off like that.
DeleteO this is a tuff one ...we went through this when Tylers dad died. its a tough one. hug
ReplyDeleteDaisy,
Deletemy dad has been dead almost 3 years now, and she keeps going through these phases...It is tough.
Thank you.