Wednesday, August 28, 2013

Decisions Decisions

Whenever a person commits to a relationship, they accept the fact that there might be a time when they are responsible for making medical decisions on behalf of the person they are committing to. Such things are not confined to the people we sleep with. Many of us make these decisions for our children, and quite often, other family members.

Every Dominant draws the line somewhere. More aptly perhaps, over and over again in a variety of places and ways.
One of the places where Alpha draws the line, is often when it comes to serious decisions about my healthcare choices. He offers his opinion, and then he expects me to make a well informed choice of my own. I will usually do research and waffle back and forth, finally settling on his original recommendation.

Of course, a strenuous objection from him would be complied with like an order, because that's just how I seem to function these days. That's probably why he offers a mild opinion and then sits back and waits for me to figure my shit out...

I think that ultimately, as long as we are able, there are decisions that should not be put on another persons' shoulders. Simply because, if the wrong decision is made, that person could be left with a lifetime of regret and guilt.

I have been waffling about a decision.
I got two possible diagnosis that are, in and of themselves, not incredibly dangerous. Though they do raise my risk for various (and more severe) health problems.

Apparently exploratory surgery is the only way to get a definitive diagnosis. Chances are, I would refuse the traditional treatment for either condition, because seriously, the last thing I need is more problems with my hormones.

Of course, as the Dr. pointed out, I could refuse traditional methods altogether, and just live in pain.
I know that sounds bad. But for the most part, pain and I have developed a working relationship.
I also think that these conditions can probably be managed in other ways.

Alpha suggested that I try alternative therapies that would likely treat/maintain both conditions without repeated surgeries, or the side effects of pharmaceutical prescriptions.
As he said, "I have offered my opinion, but this one's on you. This is one of those things that you have to decide for yourself."

I realize that this is something I will have to be conscious of for the rest of my life. I figure it will help me with that whole "mindfulness" thing that I have been working on forever.

So for now, the decision has been made--the probe happy doctor can have his good times with someone else. I am going to continue getting my masochistic needs met at home.


  1. Not that its in any way my business lol, i think you have made a good choice, you can always re-asess at a later date if needed.


  2. I'm all for alternative methods until all options have been exhausted. To me, you start taking one drug and it soon begets another drug and the cycle continues. Surgery, to me, is always the last resort. It's not that I don't trust doctors it is just that they have a license to practice medicine and that's what they do practice.

  3. I don't have any advice, but just wanted to wish you the best of possible outcomes, however you deal with this.

  4. It sounds as if you've given this a lot of thought and research. And for the record, I agree with yours (and Alpha's) decision. There are tons of "alternative" methods. Which knowing how thorough you are, you've probably already got a plan of attack.
    Hoping for the best for you :)

  5. lil, it's good that you want to try to alternative methods. I do hope it works well and it offers some relief. I know all about pain, so I can imagine just what you do have to deal with.

    There is always time for "traditional" medicine when all (better) options have been explored.

    Good luck!!!


  6. I also think you made the best choice. Hope it all works out!

  7. Hey Lil,

    I also think you have made a good choice and hope you find something that works for you.


  8. Lil: You always have to do what is best for you.
    Fortunately, this doesn't sound so dire that you can't explore one route, then at a later time, explore the surgery option again.
    Big hug freakin hugs! This is so not a walk in the park.

  9. I always feel guilty when I don't respond to everyone individually...So, sorry!


    Thank you ladies. From the bottom of my heart. I appreciate the support.


Play nice.