I think it's fair to say that my mind has been a jumbled mess lately lol.
My car broke down. Again.
I am attempting to answer the age old question of, "is there such a thing as a medicaid dentist that does a good job?" I mean should it really be my job to point out every tooth that needs a filling, where that filling needs to be placed, and go back to try again because the dentist is older than God and forgot two fillings?
One of them once refused to treat my son because I wouldn't let them anesthetize him and cap all his teeth (the kid needed one cap and a couple of fillings for fucks sake).
Okay, I feel better now lol.
Underneath the jumbled mess that passes for my surface thoughts (think onions, you know, layers and layers, most likely leading to tears. Yep. That's me lol), I have been thinking about that feeling of craving. Just...Craving Alpha's presence.
We don't often spend nights apart these days, but I ended up having to stay in town because of the car (which incidentally made no sound or scary shaking when he arrived to drive it. Wtf is up with that?).
As I was trying to pass out on my moms couch with her cat staring balefully at me, I realized that, if I have to sleep without Alpha, I can't do it without thinking about him.
Being curled up to his back. The sound of his heartbeat. The touch of his skin.
And the cat's a prude who won't blink and keeps staring.
I think a few darker thoughts...But those won't help me sleep.
That cat's out for blood. I just know it...When I pass out she's gonna rip my throat out and present it to my mother as a sacrificial gift (sounds dramatic right. That cat's a psycho bitch, what can I say).
Think about the feeling of Alpha's hands sliding down my skin, his voice whispering desires and dreams in my ear.
The feeling of his eyes sliding across my skin, his hands in my hair, his thoughts caressing my mind...
Whatdya know, the cat didn't kill me in my sleep after all.