Sunday, February 12, 2012

Say It While You Can

One of the things that struck me most when my father passed away, was the finiteness of life and all the opportunities we miss when we refuse to acknowledge it--mainly how we don't say today what we think we can tell someone tomorrow, and the things we don't do with people because we take for granted that we will always have one more chance.

I was reminded of this by a post over at Husbandly Touch. And it made me think...Of how often we miss the opportunities we are given. Simply because it can be so hard to express or people already know how we feel so we think there is no need to tell them again.

About a year before my dad died, he was going to take me out to dinner for my birthday. It turned out that he was to ill to go. We tried to reschedule a couple of times and I got a bit hurt and decided that he just didn't want to so I quit trying. Alpha pointed out that I should take the opportunity and make it happen while I could.

I never did. And the funny thing is? Now there's not a whole lot I wouldn't give to have a chance to do things differently.

It's so damn easy to get caught up in the drama and struggles of daily existence. And we forget that this life we have been given is not infinite, we forget that perhaps we cannot say tomorrow what we should say today, we forget that, for the similarity of our daily experiences, no one day will ever be exactly as the last, that opportunity is not endless. And we take for granted that the time we have been given will always be long enough to make up for the things we do not do or say.

Life is finite. So say it while you can, love while you have it, and live what you love.

Because nothing lasts forever.

20 comments:

  1. You tell 'em, lady!
    You don't realize how much the missed opportunity is going to hurt until it's too late. You never think the irreversible is going to happen to you until it does.
    Life is WAY too changeable to take it for granted.

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    1. Jz, so true. And it's far to easy to slip into taking things for granted. It can be pretty sad what it sometimes takes to make us appreciate what we have. Or had as the case may be.

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  2. Beautiful and so true! Every time my husband or son leave the house, I make sure to get in hugs, kisses and "I love you's".

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    1. Wendy, thank you. I try to always leave things with the "I love you's" too.

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  3. Amen girl. I've learned this the hard way, a few times. I try to pay better attention these days and recognize every opportunity. I'm not always successful though.

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    1. faerie, it can be rough learning the hard way huh. I seem to be an unwilling fan of learning the hard way. Even though we aren't always successful, at least we try. That's half the battle.

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  4. So true. There are no guarantees in life. I always end each conversation with I love you, in person or on the phone.

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    1. sunnygirl, there really aren't any guarantees. So it's best to make sure the people we love know how we feel isn't it.

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  5. Good reminder! I adore my daddy (still call him that) but he bugs me so much sometimes. My husband says I'm too hard on him. I need to take time to spend with him, I need to let some things go and just enjoy him. I know it but life moves swiftly and I take him for granted I guess.

    Thanks Lil, for this post. I'm going to go call him right now!

    Funny note: he always answers the phone "Yellow!" (hello) and I yell right back "blue!". It's our little inside joke. Oh how I will miss things like that when he's gone..

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    1. Stormy, we really aren't promised tomorrow. It can be a it hard to accept, but I think it makes life all the richer if we acknowledge it.
      Glad you liked the post.
      And it's those little things like your inside joke, that we tend to take for granted but make such a big difference in our daily lives, even if they are so small they seem like almost nothings.

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  6. learning from your example, thank you for blogging reading here has been quite helpful

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    1. Sir J, I am honored that you have found some of my ramblings to be helpful.

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  7. Beautifully said, and always a good reminder.

    Have i mentioned lately how much i appreciate you sharing your thoughts and your feelings and bits of your life with us?

    :-)

    Thank you.

    aisha

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    1. aisha, thank you. You made me smile. I am glad you appreciate my crazy little corner.

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  8. So true lil and so easy to forget and take for granted.

    Dee x

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    1. Dee, It is easier to take things for granted than to not. But it doesn't really pay off much.

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  9. My friend who committed suicide and I had a bit of a falling out in the couple of weeks before he did it. I wasn't feeling particularly soft toward him, and for the first time in years I didn't end my still-friendly messages to him with "Love!" or "love you."

    Then he was gone. I make such a point of always showing those I love that I do, my whole life, FOR THIS EXACT REASON, that this just slammed me.

    You're absolutely right. Things can change so fast and you never see it coming.

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    1. Conina, situations like the one you describe are so incredibly difficult because they leave us with the kind of regrets that only come with not having just one more chance.

      Though I do like to think that the dead are not constrained by our needs to hear, see, and feel love in order to know it was always there.
      Because in the end, the regret we carry doesn't really serve us. Except perhaps to remind us how precious what we love really is.

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  10. we gotta make the life we want to live...
    :)

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Play nice.