It's not wise to poke the beast. Never phrase anything as a refusal. Never pose anything as a potential challenge. Never make a statement sound like a dare. Never say "You can't." I know these things, really I do. But my sense of self preservation is intellectually challenged or something. Once again, brain says "stfu!" and mouth keeps on running.
A while back Alpha "suggested" that I find Him another woman to play with. Online, real life, not to particular. He wanted to see how far I was willing to go. And I did try. But I think I made them all run and hide under their respective little rocks lol. Fetlife made me terribly cynical. And, well, subs aren't looking for subs, their looking for Dominants. I didn't want to take up the search again (I mean, after all, I am really total shit at it apparently lol). So I suggested that He find His own play thing. But it came out wrong and sounded quite suspiciously like a dare in the realm of "you won't/can't." He raised His eyebrows and quietly replied, "you are biting off more than you can chew little one."
Note to self: do not fucking poke the Beast!