Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Say it, Do it, Be it

In the beginning, ttwd was talk. It was an idea, a concept lacking solidity--an experiment waiting for action. The words seemed awkward, the place they led unknown.
Then is became something we do. An action, a part of life. Those actions started in the bedroom where I requested they stay. We soon discovered that keeping it confined to the bed wasn't going to work--ttwd had to be a part of daily life, not just something we played at under the covers.
And so it became many pieces of the puzzle that is our relationship. It ebbs and flows like anything else in life but it has become an integral part of our day-to-day life.

As circumstance would have it, I ended up in a position of Dominance, dealing with a bunch of crap over the weekend. Alpha couldn't come help me take care of it, so I was on my own for some pretty serious events. Everything went smoothly and circumstances were also kind enough (or disappointing enough, depending on my mood lol), to allow me to pretty much wrap things up without further bloodshed.

Normally, when I have to be very Dominant, I don't slip back into my place well at all. "You want do stick what where?! *&)((^%$##!, I think not!" Forever gracious lol, as always.

When I finally stumbled back in the door Saturday night? Oh I was ALL His. No sidestepping, backtracking protesting (okay, well maybe just enough to make getting His way rewarding), or otherwise attempting to avoid my place. Oddly enough, I had no desire to resist what turned out to be a rather painful evening lol.
And that calculating detached look He was giving me? Whole new experience.

And thus I believe we are entering another evolution in ttwd--from doing to being.
And I wonder if it goes on like this forever, this evolution of D/s. Do you get to where you're going and stay there, or is it always evolving and changing? Because every time I think we have come close to the bottom of the abyss? I discover that we aren't even close.


  1. This is a very interesting thought - and one I will take a little time to pull apart. Yes, our lives are complicated and we have to be able to move from one way of "doing" to another. But "being" is a very different matter. Thank you

  2. This is it exactly - i do wonder how far it can really go, but so far the depths or the layers seem to keep appearing. I worry (of course) sometimes because i like where we are, what if i don't like where it goes? But, the doing becoming being - that's it - exactly.

  3. Alice, Glad you liked the post. I seem to be having an issue expressing reasonable thoughts this week lol.

    greengirl, I think that the "doing" leaves more space for the worrying. I'm starting to think the layers may be endless...Dunno yet lol.


Play nice.