Lately, i have been thinking about how we change and grow. Specifically M. We have learned ttwd together and wow has He ever evolved. It's like He took the concept of Dominance and dove in head first. Not a big stretch when it's been a part of one's personality forever i guess. Still, for as brutal as it can be, Dominance is a fine art; most of it mental. Throwing out things that didn't work, putting new tools in His box (and no, i don't mean the toy box), He just keeps on getting better at it. It makes me wonder sometimes, where we will be in five years, ten years, fifteen years...It's a bit like watching a lion break out of his cage--it's beautiful and dangerous, and self preservation tells you you should climb out of the ring but you want to see what he will do with his freedom. Then you realize that he was never really caged in the first place, he's just been biding his time waiting for you to open the door. And it's a glorious thrilling experience with no turning back because you are either all in or all out and there's no getting out now.
No doubt M will read this and take the opportunity to scold be about the dangers of chasing mountain lions (literally). But you know...i have always found them to be spectacular and enthralling creatures. How could a girl walk away from that?
There seem to be only a few examples of marriages that turn from Vanilla to D/s successfully. i am fascinated to read your blog (besides for the excellent writing) because you appear to have accomplished just that. thank you - and - you know - if you want to share the secrets to success.....
ReplyDeletei think that's the sweetest comment i have ever gotten greengirl.
ReplyDeletei dunno what the secrets to success are...It doesn't Always feel like a success. i am beginning to think that for me personally, the biggest thing is learning to accept the evolution at whatever pace and in whatever form it takes. His and mine. i'm having a Zen moment, can you tell lol.